Free Flowin Fridayz (Week 9)

Things always happen the way they do for a reason...right? Or so we are told. I like to believe so, but sometimes the reason chooses to remain elusive-in my case, it seems-indefinitely. You might make plans for things to happen a certain way, and you even had back-up plans in mind, but then what do you do when ALL these plans just seem to fall through? Or if they don't fall through completely they become a big, yucky mess of crap? Well my dear friends, I have no answer for this one. I wish I did. I WISHI knew...something...anything!

At this point I know nothing, and the summer isn't much of a summer when your living in limbo. You can't quite relax, and you have no idea what your doing/what to do. Alas let me stop beating around the bush and just explain the dilemma I currently face and who knows maybe one of you might have better pointers than all the 'adults.'

So, med school is currently not on the horizon. The way it stands I am rather burntout and considering the fact that I KNOW I NEED a lot of time to study for the MCAT to ensure that I do better, I need to give myself this summer to recoup, make some many, spend time with family, etc. Thus, it does not look like I will be repplying for the entering class of 2010, but instead 2011 since I probably won't be retaking the MCAT until September at the earliest, but prob January *this is the first big well DAMN this wasn't how I planned things to be, definitely wasn't planning to take 2 years off* Now this Jan MCAT option is only if I don't get into a post-bac or Master's program. Now here is *oh shit dilemma 2*. Should I really do a post-bac or master's and if not what the hell else would I be doing? The more I look at these post-bacs, the more I wonder..will I really have adequate time to prep for the test from hell? or will I repeat Junior year all over again? ALSO these programs are EXPENSIVE and they don't offer very good 'free money' or grants...[I mean not that I've gotten into one yet, but my brain always things of a bunch of things at a time]  So the main question is post-bac or not? and if not..then what will I be doing for 2 years? I could study real hard for the MCAT, retest, and then maybe go to Egypt to study for Arabic or stay here and take a science course at UNF, while possibly getting research experience somewhere or finding a medical or non-profit job of some kind  (or of course I could try this same group of things (research and Arabic in Egypt for a semester,maybe even with a science class on the side-and I haven't been to Egypt since 2005)..and the list goes on. I really hate this 2-years off thing, cuz then I coulda just applied for Teach for America...*sigh* What's worse is that me having no idea what my schedule is like causes my family's plans to be put on hold...and there is nothing I can do about it :/

So this is why life isn't as exciting as it could be right now [no I'm sorry Yazzy comments needed :) ] and I apologize in advance if you have to put up with me if I mention it to you in the next few weeks. For this is how I will be until I have made a decision. I thank those dearly, who have already put up with me.